5/19/2021
Smith Rock Ascent, Smith Rock State Park, OR - 15mi 3500ft Elevation climb and descent
I’m sitting at O’Hare Airport in Chicago, 7am, on my second leg of a redeye trip back from Portland OR and the Smith Rock Ascent 15mi Trail Run. I spent the past week with my friend Peter and his family exploring the OR mountains and coast. A beautiful place, cold water streams, snow capped mountains and a hell of a climb…
I am most interested now in providing some commentary on the race while its fresh in my mind. I woke up on race day at 330am, not able to fall back asleep. A feeling of nervous anticipation kept me awake and I did what I could to visualize crossing the finish line and not everything that had to happen in order for me to get there. I ate my fill the night before and allowed myself some extra carbohydrates to help fuel me through the race. Sweet potatoes and sourdough chocolate chip cookies.. I woke up and drank my water bottle, 32oz HydroFlask with some NUUN electrolytes that seemed to get my bowels moving and took a cold shower. Breakfast was a couple eggs, some leftover rib eye and a half of an avocado (split with Pete). I decided on a short cup of coffee and enjoyed a scoop of Peanut butter with honey to go along with it. I packed my water bottle for the race, including a raspberry, cacao and almond gel, a packet of peach flavored salt tabs (10 total in the package I think) and 2 - 6 packs of salted watermelon energy blocks. I added another NUUN tab to the water in my race bottle (Nathan, 16oz). For the race I decided to tape my heels with blue athletic tape Pete had picked up at REI the day before. We decided to hike Dog Mountain in WA the previous Wednesday and the 2700 ft elevation climb along with a very fast run back down the mountain left my quads feeling sore and the heels of both feet with the beginning of some deep blisters that I was afraid would cause some issues on the trail, especially in the downhills. The tape felt good and tight to my skin as I pulled my socks and shoes on. I love my HOKA ONE ONE’s and the feeling of stability they provide. I made a bathroom stop on the way to the mountain and was feeling not quite 100% relieved getting to Smith Rock. It was a very nice, sunny morning at the start, still cool when we arrived but the short shorts and tank tops of the more seasoned runners were proof that extra layers would soon not be necessary. I decided to keep my windbreaker coat on for the start of the race but believe that was a mistake, although it caused no issues wrapped around my waist for most of the run.
I gave a “good luck” to Pete who started about 10 minutes before me in the Covid compelled staggered start. I was very glad to have the extra time and to hit the porto John for my number 3 number 2 of the morning, this time finally feeling good getting up. The nervous butterfly’s certainly got my insides moving, I guess my mind sent that signal to my guts and the extra carbs I had been enjoying sped up my system. I was very happy for that final bathroom stop before the run and got up ready to move. I started with about 6 other runners and quickly moved past the group and headed down the steep downhill start. I cursed Pete for having us do that big hike and downhill run only 5 days before.. My quads ached and I felt some real pain in my calves and achilles, especially on my right side. I kept moving and checked my watch first at 1.5mi in. I recognized my mind was going negative and took my focus off the pain in my legs and not feeling 100% and recited the mantra “I feel outstanding” over and over. I knew my goal, and focusing on completion was most important, so I did my best to avoid thinking of the remaining 13.5mi of movement, instead focusing on the task at hand, putting 1 foot in front of the other. "One step at a time” and “I feel outstanding” were my mantra’s.
After a few rolling miles I felt my body heating up but the beginning phase posed some real challenges looking back on the race. It took a few miles to get the creaks out of my body. The lactic acid that was piled up in my jacked up quads started moving to my right hip and I found myself contending with the weak inner voice stuck in my head, wanting to focus on the pain. When that chatter rose I brought my attention back to my breath, focused on tackling the challenge one step at a time and just kept going. I felt the sweat beads start dropping from my face and wrists and took off my windbreaker. I wore my lucky brand cotton v-neck tee-shirt which wasn’t the best pick for such a long distance but didn’t really impact my running other that later in the race feeling some chaffing on my nipples. I was relieved to see that most other runners were slowing down to hike the first climb of the race, about 1000 feet of switchbacks at the 4mi mark. I was immediately aware that the elevation work I had put in at Mount Tom and earlier in the week with Peter was going to pay off. My hamstrings and glutes felt so strong, and I knew that I could go uphill all day, leaning forward up the climb and sending my breath to those large muscles in the back of my legs. I contended with that internal chatter reminding me periodically that the big challenge still lay ahead, the BIG climb.. Grey butte..
After that first climb I felt the soreness moving out of my legs and my body getting really warm. The sun was still hidden behind the eucalyptus covered hills and the cool air chilled my body as I got onto the single track rolling trail that marked the next 2 or so miles before the first aid station and climb up Grey Butte. This was the most challenging part of the race for me. I kept witnessing my mind and attention go to the other runners.. On the single track I could hear the faster runners coming and I would have to awkwardly step up on the steep hill to let them pass. Most racers were quick to thank me and say "good run” but I felt my energy draining the more I focused on them and how I compared at that moment in the race. I knew the flat portions would be more difficult because I didn’t spend much time at all training that way. As the trails rolled I let my mind run and then consciously bring it back to my breath and my mantra’s time and time again.. “I feel outstanding!”, “One step at a time…”. I knew it wasn’t at all helpful to compare myself to these other people, and that in doing so I was robbing myself of vital energy. Suddenly, I became so clear and I began to become very grateful for the opportunity I had in front of me. An opportunity to challenge myself and focus solely on me, my run and the present moment for a few hours.
In a moment my energy shifted.. I began to feel so grateful for my body and muscles and my strength, physical, cardiovascular and most importantly mental. Shifting that focus from competition and what others around me were doing to gratitude and the feelings of my body and sensations of the breath totally shifted my perspective and outlook on the race. I wasn’t competing with anyone but myself and I realized that more and more clearly each time I took control of my mind and gave it the guidance of following the breath, focusing on those strong, well trained muscles in my legs and core and taking 1 step, focusing on “one step at a time”. The climb began in waves leading up to the next aid station and I was happy to go with the flow of other runners and hike up the steeper segments, bringing my heart rate down as I did so. The trail became less like dry gravel and more like hardened clay with horseshoe prints covering a good part of the trail, I noticed elk or deer crap on the trail as well and felt more energy rise up again as I became more aware of my beautiful setting for the race, the views and cool morning air and spots of warm sun amidst the dry hills. I grabbed eucalyptus and rubbed the oils out on my fingers and thumb and spelt the clean sweet smell and that energized me as well. At the aid station I picked a half of a banana and it felt good to hear some music and get a smile from the volunteers. Their were many people, climbers mostly, camped out in their tents and 4x4s at this part of the trail. I allowed my thoughts to wander to the “dirtbags” and that cool way of life. Smiling, modern day hippies all around. I let the song “Ant’s Marching” by DMB repeat in my mind. Still a constant focus was paid to my breath and breathing strength to the backs of my legs as we wound the trail up and up. I started feeling the beginning cries of a cramp in my left groin and remembered this same impediment from my last go at this climb 2 years prior.. I grabbed 3 salt tabs and swished them down with my now diluted electrolyte drink and decided to take down some of the energy blocks I brought along as well. I’m so glad I did.. The salt tabs helped relieve the cramps and I felt a surge of energy from the satisfying watermelon sugar/ salt snacks as I approached the big climb of 1800 almost vertical feet. I felt a great sense of stability with my HOKA’s and soon got into a rhythm with the hike. I refused to stare the peak in the eye as it approached.. I kept my head down, leaned forward and took it on step by step. I felt so good, and decided to push myself. I swung my arms and felt the yoga-built strength in my core and backside kick in more and more, my cardio was on point as well. Long exhales and double inhales and I was off. I started taking souls..
Those people that had passed me on the flats were now looking at me as they paused on the steep hillside. They looked in disbelief as I power hiked the slope, passing most of the pack and setting a pace forr everyone around me; even the most serious looking “runners”. It felt amazing and I was so proud of myself. The more proud I was the better I felt and more energy I received. Step by step I took on the climb, never looking past 2 steps ahead, not until I was about 50 feet from the summit and I felt the rush of completing the biggest climb and half of the race well up in me. I passed more people on that last segment and must thank my shoes for the great tread and stability they provided on the loose rocks and dried mud. Once at the top I took just a moment to view the spectacular cascade mountain range and rolling farms and fields below. We were about 5k feet up at that point and the gnats were thick in the still air so I decided to keep moving and delay any further nutrition until the next aid station. I was afraid of the steep downhill after summiting Grey Butte, especially because my quads were still throbbing considerably, so I took it slow initially. The rush and energy of the climb and taking souls en route was still flowing through me and I soon began bounding my way down the hillside. Expertly jumping from rock to rock and keeping my momentum going as I did so. Before I knew it the long downhill was almost over and with it those views were gone and I was glad for that. I got myself into an almost sprint-like pace and started recognizing the strong runners I was comparing myself to earlier in the race, that had passed me, and I was passing them! I was just glad at how strong I felt and instead of competing with those other people found a deep focus inward to my heart and soul and found clarity and focus on the present.
At the next aid station I was buzzing and I tapped even more energy from the volunteers. I grabbed some more water, a banana and a freeze pop and kept on going. Before I knew it I was 10.5 mi in! And it only took me 2:20 minutes! I started doing some quick math and was exhilarated to realize that I was going to be able to crush my goal time of completing the race in under 4 hours. Could I do it in 3 hours? With still some elevation to go I knew it would be a stretch but I let myself go for it. For the first time in 2 tries at the race I let myself go. I let go of fear.. I pushed hard and put my focus on creating energy instead of reserving it.. I took energy from the mountain, my breath and most of all the growing clarity that the movement mediation I was undergoing had provided. By going back and back again to my breath and mantra’s I was realizing a deep meditative state and in that state my energy flowed freely. I bounded my way through the rolling single track that before posed so many self imposed obstacles and found myself chasing the runners in front of me, loving myself and my ability to excel in the moment. I treated myself to the raspberry gel at 12.5 mi in and with the finish in site geared down and swung my arms to keep my lower body and core moving. As we got closer to the finish I felt the mental drain caused by focusing on time and my new goal of 3hours.. I did my best to bring attention back to the present and kept moving fast, pulling in a 10:30mi at mi 13! As my water ran out and the heat kept climbing it was a challenge keeping focus on the task at hand which was becoming more and more challenging. I feel that in those moments, drained, out of water and coming off a euphoric rush of adrenaline after the big summit and downhill that I made the greatest strides in building my mental and physical toughness. I kept my head down and stayed focused on the task at hand and before I knew it I was less than a mile away.
That last mile was tough in the dry heat with my drained water bottle in tow. I didn’t stop, I kept going and saw several other runners whose eyes clearly showed their energy was also drained as we were approaching the finish line. Smiles and encouragement from the race onlookers and family members of other runners fueled me on this last leg. Its amazing how much energy a smile can give you.
I made it up the steep hill to close out the race feeling so strong and grateful. For my strong lungs and legs, for my improvement from the previous run (beating my time by more than 40 minutes, finishing at 3:24!) for my new appreciation to include proper nutrition to help fuel my body and relieve the inevitable cramping, also for my shoes and the right move to tape my blistered heels. I was most impressed by my ability to remain clear and avoid the energy suck of comparing myself to others. I let my mind do its thing, like an ocean waves my mind thinks, but on that trail where its most important to conserve energy and complete a difficult challenge I used my mantra’s and meditation techniques to lull myself into a kind of beautiful trance. In that trance I let elevated emotions like joy, gratitude and love overwhelm me and let any thoughts of fear or competition go out with each exhale. My yoga in practice! I also felt the beautiful energy of what David Goggins refers to as “taking souls”. Feeling the astonishment of other runners as I power hiked by on that huge climb. It felt amazing to feel proud of myself.. To be impressed by my abilities and strength and to set myself apart from the pack. I know that these challenges will become more a part of my life and am excited to plan on my next challenge, maybe a TRUE ultra 50k next! The race proved to me how physical exercise is a great way to tap into the meditative state. I’m so interested and captivated by our minds ability and am grateful to have had this opportunity to practice it and challenge my entire mind, body and soul. I think this will help me immensely in helping others find a reliable way to get out of their heads and into their bodies and get peaceful again. I’m excited for what the future has to bring and how far I can push these limits!
Getting close to the top of Grey Butte…
Eucalyptus for miles
The Goonies Rock aka Haystack Rock - Pete, Chaundra and Jacky boy
“On your left!!”…